I Hope You Dance

So I started to think back about my post last week, Why we love him so. If daddy being home during the week is such a gift to us, does that mean the days without him are not? Of course, not. I began to wonder what God wanted me to learn on the days when daddy was out of town and the girls and I were on our own. I used to dread even just one day without Morgan. There's something so comforting about knowing that your man is home. Today, I can say that I'm much more prepared to go at it alone than I used to be. It definitely helps when I have activities planned and things like school work to keep us busy. Last week, I had a breakthrough moment while Morgan was gone one night. One of those "ah-ha" moments that I wanted to share.

Have you ever been so heck-bent on being a good mom that in the process, you forgot what it was like, just to be you? I'm talking about the God-given, special parts that are unique to only you. The parts that God absolutely wants us to share with our kids, too! For me, I find that the hardest part about being a good parent is "being what we wish our children to be." Everyday, it seems I fall short in some way. On the days when Morgan was gone, my short comings appeared to be more visible. I didn't like that.

I typically tried to be very structured and purposeful on the days when he was gone. My purpose was to get through the day without too much drama. Unfortunately, I'm referring here to "mommy drama." Things always seemed a bit more stressed when our family wasn't whole. Along with stress comes shorter words, a shorter fuse, and just an overall sense of survival, rather than peace and enjoyment.

One thing that's helped quite a bit in our house lately is music. Whenever we have any down time, I turn on some worship tunes as background music. It helps to keep us all in a light and good mood. Last week, I took it a step further. One night when daddy was gone, I cranked up the volume and turned on some of our favorite dance tunes (i.e. Toby Mac). The girls were finishing their dinner but mommy was already dancing in the kitchen. And I'm not talking about that half-hearted little dance we all do when we hear a catchy tune. I'm talking about an all out, uninhibited, "I don't care who's watching" kind of dance. The kind of dancing that moves your soul.

Background: Dance was a very big part of my life growing up. Ever since I was little, dance/cheer/song made up much of my younger years. I danced and cheered my way through the first two years of college before finally hanging it up to focus on my studies. In addition, while we were dating, Morgan and I used to go out dancing with friends almost every weekend. Such FUN times! For me, dancing is the one thing that makes both my heart and spirit soar. It brings me great joy and a feeling of confidence and freedom.

Back to the kitchen... I was lost in my dancing and having a GRAND time. My girls were watching of course and soon, they asked if they could be excused to GET UP and DANCE, too! That's when it happened... the DANCE PARTY in the kitchen began and we lost ourselves in the music for a short while. Soon after, the "ah-ha" moment followed...

Yes, God wants me to be a good teacher, disciplinarian, shepherd, and mom. He also wants me to share with my children the unique parts that make up "me" the person and woman. The parts that make me laugh and smile and bring out great abandonment. God designed each one of us moms to be the perfect match for our kids. He already knew all of our weaknesses yet He still chose us! Amazing!

When Morgan called that night, the first thing the girls told him was, "Daddy, we had a DANCE PARTY and you missed it!" And then it hit me... these are the kind of precious memories that I want my girls to remember. Long after the manners are learned and the sharing is mastered, I want my kids to know not just the mother in me but the real "me." The woman who loves to dance and shake her booty in the kitchen. The one who can have fun on "the spur of the moment." The one who can lose herself (if even just for a little while), to something bigger and greater than herself, her schedule, her chores, or her lists.

Perhaps daddy needed to be gone in order for mommy to "hear" the music again?

Whether it's dance, playing an instrument, crafting, bowling, or horseback riding... whatever that thing is that brings out the heart and soul in you- make sure your children see you doing just that. Hopefully, it's something they can participate in as well. Not because we want them to turn out like us, but because we want them to see what it truly means to live in the moment and be delighted by the simplest of life's joys.

“Dancing with the feet is one thing, but dancing with the heart is another.”
~ Author Unknown

"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who did not hear the music." ~ Angela Monet