Conversations about adoption

24 July 2009

My girlie-girls- this is how they dress themselves everyday.

The girls are starting to understand that they are adopted. Well, as much as they can at this early age. Often, I would discuss the subject with them when we talked about babies or friends who were expecting. About a year ago, it started out as a one-way conversation but now, it has grown to be quite a little dialogue. I wasn't even sure if they were 'getting it' but of course, it's always a little surprising once you hear them talk about it out loud.

Over the last week, they have brought it up on various occasions. Once was when we saw my brother and his wife last week. They are expecting their first child any day now. Woo-hoo! Anyway, Faith touched Emily's stomach and asked if the baby had kicked her belly. Emily told her that yes, sometimes, the baby does kick. To my surprise, Faith responded by saying that when she was a baby, she used to kick another woman's stomach, too. Then she went on to explain that she didn't come out of her mommy's stomach, she came out of another woman's stomach. She followed by saying, "I'm adopted." To which we all replied. "That's right! And that's why you and your sister are so special!"
For now, I have refrained from using the term 'birth mom' or another 'mommy'. Simply because I feel that in their little world, one mommy is all that their hearts could and should process right now. In the future, I'm sure that we will refer to their biological mom as their birth mom.

I have taken every opportunity to share how God created our family with them. I tell them the story of how daddy and I prayed and prayed for one baby and instead, God surprised us with TWO! They usually laugh with glee as I tell them the story of how surprised and happy we were when we heard the news and how far we flew in a plane to meet them. Lately, they have been asking me about the early months of their life. They wanted to know if there was a doctor, a hospital, what they ate, and if they had a basket. The basket threw me off a little but I said, "Yes, there was probably a basket." Then they asked if they floated down a river in the basket!

Huh?? "You know mommy, just like baby Moses."

What smart little cookies I have.

We are so blessed and fortunate to have a small circle of fellow adopted friends and family members. As you can tell from the story above, the girls are beginning to get it, in their own, 3 year-old way. I'm so thankful that I can use biblical figures like Moses and Esther to help my daughters understand that no matter what our bloodlines are, it is the blood of Jesus Christ that matters most. Every life matters to God and He created each one of us to take our own journey towards Him. Morgan and I will do our best to keep the lines of communication open and willing to discuss their adoption at any time. My hope and prayer is that this will lead to security, clarity, and a knowledge of a greater plan and purpose in the lives of our children.

Anonymous said...

hi :)

I have an adopted baby brother. although originally i have 4 other siblings.

we had him since he was 1 week old, and he was 7 years old now...

i never knew that me and my family could love someone although not blood related.

we love him so much. he is a spoiled brat :) haha!

The Letter 'W' said...

that part about floating down the river in a basket is hysterical!!

Hailey said...

I love how they are understanding more and more. I especially love to watch how you and Morgan show them how special their adoption was - simply beautiful.

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