The Heart of the Matter

13 May 2010


Morgan and I have made a conscious decision to move away from spanking and even time-outs. Why? Because now that our children are getting older, they are more capable of understanding scripture as well as what God desires for us. In our home, we used spanking for willful disobedience. We tried never to spank in anger but in love.

We used 4 steps:
-the explanation of the sin
-the spank
-the forgiveness
-the reconciliation.

If done properly, I believe that spanking can help children grow in self-control, respect, and obedience. Our goal as parents is to eventually lead our children to see their own sin. In doing so, we hope to better prepare them for a heart that understands the need of a Savior. Without a doubt, spanking is "easy" compared to taking the time to open up the bible and show our children the ways of God.

I always tell my girls that God has a very special plan for them and that He chose us to be their parents so that we can teach them to be like Christ and prepare them for that plan. Lately, I have to admit, at times, it's been down right exhausting. But we persevere and keep at it because we know there is no greater calling as a parent. "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

A gift of encouragement!
Earlier this week, I was thoughtfully explaining to Faith why "talking-back" to your parents is disrespectful and rude. Then, all by herself, she quoted Colossians 3:20, "Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord." Right, mom?- I couldn't help but smile. As with everything in parenting, guiding my children to the heart of God has given me more opportunities to pray.

In Biblical parenting, the parent must look past the behavior and see the heart issue. For it is the heart which must be softened and encouraged toward God. ~Training Children With Grace and Truth

"You cannot control your children, you say. Then the Lord have mercy on you! It is your business to do it, and you must do it, or else you will soon find they will control you. No one knows what judgment will come from God upon those who allow sin in children to go unrebuked."
~ Charles Spurgeon

"Education in itself without moral correction does little except to produce clever sinners." ~ Melvin Tinker

"If we never have headaches through rebuking our children, we shall have plenty of heartaches when they grow up." ~ Charles Spurgeon
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