Much ado about birthdays

Is it possible that in just two shorts months, my sweet little girls are turning 4?? I can hardly believe it. Weren't they just 11 months old when we brought them home from Korea? It's amazing to think how fast time has passed. I'm the type of person who doesn't like to procrastinate on much so I've already started to think about their birthday festivities. I know, I know, early planning can be both helpful and annoying at the same time. Anyway, in the last couple of weeks or so, I've had a wide range of thoughts regarding birthdays.

I have to say that I originally planned to have a small, weekday, home school party for the girls. I envisioned having just a few of their close friends (and their moms/my girlfriends) over for lunch and cake. Easy-peasy, right? Well, guess what? Things have changed. After talking it out with Morgan, we are happily throwing our girls a "big" party. When I say "big" party, I'm talking about a weekend party with friends and family. The kind that actually takes some pre-planning. The kind where I end up cleaning my whole house beforehand. We've done the big party for the last 3 years and I guess in my own way, I almost decided that this year, another one was not necessary. I'll be honest, most of my reasons had nothing to do with the girls, it had more to do with my own issues. Issues like laziness and the stress of preparing all the details. I know it sounds silly but I even thought, "What would people think if I threw my kids a "big" party every year?" I'm thankful that after I shared what I was feeling with Morgan, I was quickly able to see that this was not about me and my random, self-inflicted hang-ups. It was about my girls turning 4! Something that only happens once in their life, I might add! All this led me to ask myself, "What do I really wanted to teach my children about birthdays anyway?"

Here's what it came down to...

I am passionate about teaching my children the joy in giving and serving.

I want them to learn an attitude of gratitude in the very small as well as the big things in life. Aside from my own hang-ups about throwing a party, I guess I was a little leery of setting high birthday expectations for my children. This is what I came to understand and hope for... after all the years have come and gone, I hope and pray that our kids will remember the joy they felt on their birthday, that special moment in time that was just for them, long after the novelty of the party or special present has passed. Instead of teaching my kids any type of entitlement or expectation, I pray that with each birthday party (however big or small), I will be teaching them the joy of celebrating life. What a beautiful thing for a mother to teach her children. I decided that that's the kind of mom I wanted to be. I want to teach my kids that life is to be valued, appreciated, honored, and yes, celebrated! This doesn't mean that every year we're going to have a budget for a big party. It just means that every year, their birthday will be celebrated with BIG love, joy, and gratitude.

Ok, another confession... before kids, I liked to entertain but another hesitation of throwing a big party was the fact that it often means lots of food and preparations. In other words, lots of time and energy. Neither Morgan or I wanted to be stuck in the kitchen or on the grill outside. We wanted to be fully present and enjoy the moment with our growing kids. Because of that, we have decided to fore go some previous plans and use that money towards catering food for the party instead. We've also decided to limit the number of kids to just a few of their close friends. At this age, 5 kids at your party is just as much fun as 10 kids. I love the fact that I was able to work it out and have a brand new attitude when it comes to birthdays. Like all new moms, I guess I just had to figure out what I wanted birthdays to look like for my kids going forward.

On a side note, the other night, the girls wanted to see some pictures on our blog (as they often do) and we ended up clicking on their homecoming video. As we watched it together, I couldn't help but well-up inside with so many emotions of how we first came to be a family. It became so clear and evident to me. It was as if God was saying, "Don't forget, there is much to celebrate." Yes, there certainly is. Have I mentioned how happy and excited I am about throwing a birthday party for our girls?

God is so good. I can't believe Faith and Grace are about to turn 4!!