The Sheltered Homeschooler

Recently, a relative of mine openly shared her concerns for our children upon hearing that we may homeschool them until college.  She was primarily concerned with the girls’ ability to adjust to the “real world” as well as the potential “culture shock” they may have from leaving our nest and entering college.  I suppose for most people, my relative’s concerns are normal and frankly, valid.

We have dreams and desires for our children just like all parents do but we also know that no matter what we do, we are not the ones in control of their future.  It’s odd to me… when did “sheltering our children” become such a negative thing in our current society?  As if  the world we live in today resembles some peachy 50’s TV show?  As parents, we feel that it’s our God-given responsibility to shelter them.  I think there’s an underlying myth behind the word “sheltering” that most people who aren’t in the trenches of homeschooling often view as synonymous with ‘hindering’ or ‘oppression’, rather than the freedom to slowly learn the ropes of life through the protective eyes and guidance of one’s parents.

I don’t have the time or inclination to go into further right now but I stumbled upon a well written post from Bailey, a 17 year-old homeschooler who is more eloquent and articulate than I’ll ever be.  She does an outstanding job of educating anyone who wishes to understand the difference between positive vs. negative sheltering. 

“The point of sheltering ought not to be to hide a child away from the storm so much as to equip him with an umbrella and rubber boots. It's not a place of buried heads but working minds. I feel very comfortable engaging with the world at large now that the rubber has met the road in some instances, and I credit that to my chance at viewing it differently -- a chance to figure out humanism before why people can be so mean, if you will.”

Read the rest of this interesting and thought provoking article here.

Morgan and I are constantly navigating our way through parenting and teaching our children.  We do not advocate wearing blinders to the world, but at the same time, we are in no hurry to see our children lose their innocence, either.  As Christians, we would do well to remember that we are called to parent our children in a way that glorifies and pleases the Lord, not the world.  Ultimately, we know it is by God’s grace alone that any child (homeschooled or not) grows up to be a mature, God-loving, God-serving adult. 

After all, I’m still a work in progress, too.

A Letter to My Children About Marriage

Do all little girls dream about their wedding day? 

I don’t remember doing so as a child but my girls sure do.  They love to dress up as the lovely bride.  They don their long white dresses, carrying a pretty bouquet of flowers while asking daddy to play their handsome “groom.”  Perhaps they were a bit enamored with the family wedding we attended last year?  It’s true, they do enjoy watching our wedding video, each year on our anniversary.  Maybe they’re fascinated with the idea of a wedding because mommy and daddy make marriage seem so… blissful?  Ha!  One can hope. 

Whatever their fascination, my girls are at the age where I can talk to them openly about the truth when it comes to weddings.  Anytime they bring up their wedding day, I say,

“You know, a wedding lasts only a day but a marriage lasts a lifetime.” 

I don’t say this of course to squelch their girlie imaginations but simply because it is the sobering truth.  It’s my way of saying, “We should spend more time learning about the qualities that will help us become a godly wife and spend less time, day-dreaming about how poufy our wedding dress might be.” (smile)

Kelly, at Generation Cedar wrote this counter cultural letter to her children regarding marriage.  In a world where grounds for divorce or shall I say, “irreconcilable differences” actually means, “he changed”, “she changed”, “we just don’t see eye to eye anymore” or “it just got too hard.” I think her post is timeless, powerful and chock-full of wisdom for the next generation.   

Dear Children,

Should the Lord give you the good gift of a husband or wife, and I hope He does, there are a few things I want you to know. Things that you may not hear from anyone else, and certainly not on TV or other media. Sadly, your church may not even tell you.

Marriage, sweet little people, is not for the purpose of your happiness. Happy as I want you to be and hope you will be, you must yet understand that marriage is God’s design and His purposes must be pursued in order for you to be truly happy. His end is holiness and He will use all things in a life devoted to Him to fulfill that end.

Whether you are blessed with a daughter or a son, read the rest here.