The colors of sunrise.
Where do I begin? I guess by first stating that being a mom is not for the faint of heart. It is a full-time job like no other. It is not only physically demanding, it is also emotionally demanding, everyday. One word that best comes to mind about being a mom is "multi-
tasker." We are constantly checking the time, aren't we? That's so we can manage the other dozen things we need to do today. On top of all that, we are loving, training and disciplining our children at every turn. Some have even said that your life is not your own anymore. I see that. For me, it's a good thing. I was ready for that. Heck, I probably needed that! Like it or not, soon enough, motherhood also brings to light every flaw we have... and then it magnifies it.
Joy! This is not to say that motherhood doesn't bring about the gentler more lovely parts of us, too. It certainly does that as well. I heard something recently that I've been thinking a lot about. It went something like this...
If we ask God for courage, do you think He just gives us courage or does He give us opportunities to be more courageous?
If we ask God for patience, does He automatically just grant us patience or does He give us opportunities to learn patience?
If we ask God for more love, does He just zap us with warm and fuzzy feelings or does He give us opportunities to love one another?
It made me realize that everything that happens in my day is in direct relation to what I pray for every morning. This may be obvious to some but for busy moms, we are often just too busy to sit and reflect. Since taking care of my girls is my main job, God is graciously placing opportunities in front of me to help me grow.
For example, I knew going into motherhood that patience was not my virtue. I have grown much in this area over the years but I still have a way to go. By and large, our girls are great and I have no complaints about them or my husband. I only have feelings of enormous love and thankfulness. There are, however, occasional days when life as a toddler and being the mother of those toddlers is tougher than others. I am aware that training a child in the way in which we want them to grow requires much more than words.
It actually requires living that way, by example. Even still, if you came to my house some afternoons, you'd think that my kids couldn't hear, based on the volume of my voice. Yes, although words are powerful and necessary, actions do speak louder than words. I have to keep reminding myself of that.
As moms, we are never really truly at rest are we? We have such a responsibility and commitment to our children and their future.
When I think about the fact that our girls will mostly learn how to live life and love others by my example....
Wow. There is no choice but to be better at it myself.
Being a mom is so much more than I can explain here. Other than God's love for us, there is no greater love. It took me becoming a mom myself to figure that one out. It is the most challenging and fulfilling thing that I will ever do in my lifetime and although most days are blissful and contented, there will be some days that just aren't that pretty. I thank God for those opportunities. In many ways, it is our children who become our teachers.
Lastly, I never thought that I would be singing children's songs out loud, in public. I'm talking about at the grocery store, departments stores, restaurants, you name it. I can't even carry a tune but you know what? It doesn't matter and I don't care. It's just this strange thing that happens when you become a parent. We do it because it brings joy to our kids and there's nothing better than seeing their sweet faces light up with laughter. We also do it now, just because we can.